Tuesday, April 8, 2025

Chorus of Frogs Trigger some stuff

Date: 4/8/2025
Type: Unknown
Location: Los Angeles, CA, 90023
Time of Incidents: 3:30am
Attempted Time of Sleep: 3:30am
State of Mind Before: Me (Tired, Depressed), Wolfbrother (Agitated)
State of Mind After: Me (Depressed, Tired, Apathetic), Wolfbrother (Happy), Aunt (N/A)
Odd occurrences before: None
Odd occurrences after: Noises in adjacent location

I was supposed to go today for some car maintenance, however my Wolfbrother kept me up all night. Hw refused to go to sleep despite the numerous mentions that I need to get the car looked at....and I am planning to go on this date. He finally decided to settle down around 2:30am and then wanted food. By 3:15am I had to call it quits as I had to be up by 7:00am. My mental state is not well as he is wearing me down both physically and mentally. My physical health has been impacted by his constant smoking. He is aware I am not doing well, but refuse to quit or lessen his usage as it is a "me problem" and I have to do better. 

As expected I had to retreat to the second location (his emotional abuse gets to me more as I am having trouble breathing...right now he did it again... on how he hates me and hates being here.....but I am only the best alternative for right now). I don't like being in there since it isolate me from the rest of the house. At first "they" were confused as to where I was....but they know I am there. Most of the time I have no thought about them and I am ok...... but when they have found me.... it wasn't pleasant. I am not sure if I am accurately put to pen the incidents since my wolfbrother is eroding things or it is their doing or I am trying to safe guard my own sanity (*&*).

So reason why I am reporting. As I go to sleep I often use some ambiance to help sleep....from oceans waves, rain, crickets, bubbles, etc. Not only does this relax me, but helps my Wolfbrother too. Last night though I tried to use frogs by a stream, something I have not used in years. It is soothing....but I had a horrible reaction. As soon as I tried to lay down... images of "them" came to my head... and the strong feeling of "we are coming". Then the odd noises in other areas of the adjacent location had a few weird noises. Immediately I started imagining a barred door and a wind to scour the area and block entry. I turned off that frog sound as it was freaking me out. I couldn't go to sleep and was having a minor (by my level) anxiety attack. At this point I could not sleep. Finally I felt some what safe around 5:20am and physically knocked out. Sadly my attempts comfort myself were sabotaged by "their" previous intrusions.

(*&*): Since February there having been secondary scenarios that started to run as dreams...basically it was stuff with unrequited love finally be returned by certain characters from my path. I was confused in these dreams, as I knew these weren't real and do not know why these were coming up. However, I went along with them because it felt nice. I knew it was "them", but really didn't care as I hurt soooooo much. I figured out it was them after the second such scenario as I was getting secondary audio commenting on the situation, my response, and how detailed things were getting. After a week it switched... to were I was told and experienced the complete opposite.... on how I was worthless, unwanted, despised, sickened, a disappointment, a disgusting creature, not even a real man, an aberration to humanity, that no one their right mind would want to be with, someone who deserves to be unloved, that I am nothing, that I am sick, I have no redeeming value, and if people are kind to me it is only because I am a sap with no self-esteem who is willing let other use him for the least amount of acknowledgement, that is how pathetic of a specimen that I am. 

At first I was confused. I have heard worse. Yet they kept representing anyone who showed me any kindness...."reveal" the truth. I am trying not to let it affect me and just remain apathetic. If I can't feel I can't get hurt....they stopped as I became unresponsive to "their" insults. However for now there  negativity echoes....I do not know if it is a way to continue to isolate me or they just decided to go here? 

I am not doing well. I can function though despite this. However they are right..... as long as they are involved in my life I am a hazard to others. I am already aware of this. I wonder if they are trying to push me to certain eventualities that are planned?   

Sunday, March 16, 2025

Short Visit before the 50

 

Date: 2/13/2025
Type: CE4
Location: Los Angeles, CA, 90023
Time of Incidents: 12:30am
Attempted Time of Sleep: 11:30pm
State of Mind Before: Me (Tired, Depressed), Wolfbrother (Upset)
State of Mind After: Me (Depressed, Apathetic), Wolfbrother (Upset), Aunt (N/A)
Odd occurrences before: None
Odd occurrences after: Loud Thud on Floor of Garage

When Wolfbrother's father visits it is usually time for me to retreat to other room for rest. As mentioned to him, I don't want to be isolated this month as it is my 50th. As it is I am showing my symptoms of my depression, usually this does manifest as hard. I do not have anxiety that they may show up....but personally I don't feel well mentally or physically.

As for Wednesday, I went to the room and watched some stuff on youtube to try and elevate my mood. Around 11:30pm, I got myself in bedding and lay down. I know I was mentally and physically exhausted, but I was unusually fast tracked to knock out (it take me an hour or so to ease my mind and feel comfortable to sleep). The next thing I am in a white fluffy room, almost like felt. There was ambient lighting, nothing stood out except for this felt room. There was a conversation going on, not vocal, but "their voices". 

"Is he relaxed?".... "Seems this is not causing any hostile reactions. Proceed"..... from there an appendage stretched out... cotton and felt like... that began to caress my cheek and mouth. "Is he responding? I hope is is somewhat aware".... "That is it. Something you like. Something you want. You deserve to be loved"... the appendage is being a bit more forceful and I am becoming angry... "He loves you doesn't he? Wait. He loves you doesn't he? Why are you angry? He loves you doesn't he?" ... I start to breathe hard in rapid succession trying to get out of this....."Why is he there then? Why do you care? You make no sense. Nobody loves you? Why are you hurt? So much pain. So much sadness".... they let me go.

This situation was about 5 minutes or so.... it could have been longer but as soon as I was aware and triggered I did everything to get "ejected". I noticed despite being bundle up and warm, there was a specific cold spot on my left shoulder and chest, as well as where the appendage was stroking me along my face. I lay there angry.... I hate when they bring up relationship stuff.... and begin examining my personal "feelings". They don't get why I am this way nor why I feel certain things about situations and people. As I lay there for about 15 minutes, behind the wall in the garage there was a thud.... one that sounded like a very heavy iron ball falling on the ground. That made no sense as the garage is locked, no one was in there, and there is no such items that would make such a sound. The neighbor was asleep and they did not cause the sound from their dwelling. In the morning I checked the garage and there wasn't anything out of place. What concerned me was the odd sound was right behind the wall where I was sleeping necx too.  

Sunday, February 16, 2025

Visitation in the adjacent room

 

Date: 2/15/2025
Type: CE4
Location: Los Angeles, CA, 90023
Time of Incidents: 2:00am
Attempted Time of Sleep: 1:00am
State of Mind Before: Me (Tired), Wolfbrother (Upset)
State of Mind After: Me (Depressed, Apathetic), Wolfbrother (Upset), Aunt (N/A)
Odd occurrences before: A Bump in the kitchen
Odd occurrences after: Distortion Field, Diffused Light Field

This Friday evening my Wolfbrother's dad came to visit and they usually watch some movies. I did have to have a talk with his dad about my Wolfbrother recent behavior and concerns, especially the increase in smoking. As one it is not good for my Wolfbrother, and two it is a financial burden. My Wolfbrother seemed to be out of it that evening and was not too happy about the news that he need to stick to a set number of packs per week. We watched "Lady Ballers", which I found funny and was in an overall good mood. I then told them I had to perform my other duties and would go to bed, so I left them to watch "Wicked". I did my nightly routine and checked in on my aunt, and around 12:00am I went to our auxiliary area to sleep.

Over the past year this overflow area is my place to get away from my Wolfbrother when he has issues. It is comfortable, and in the room I have a bed-tent which keeps me nice and cozy. I have a soundboard playing cricket music and the windows have a diffused privacy screen. I have my wards in the room to keep my safe. The other rooms in there are an empty kitchen and another room with a TV and couch. I got ready for bed, I was just tired and needed sleep since it has been a couple rough days with my Wolfbrother. I had the soundboard on with crickets and was nice and cozy in my tent. Right before I went to sleep something bumped/banged in the EMPTY KITCHEN. I was too tired to care....and tried to clear my thoughts to sleep and not be depressed.

DREAM

For some odd reason I was having a dream. I was visiting my mother and stepfather in a Victorian style house they went to a vacation at. They were asleep. I had some supplies with me, food that I had picked up for later and the trip home. I went to the drawing room and lay on the couch to take a nap as I was tired. I knew that I was dreaming....and was fine with it. The Victorian house was detailed quite well, with the mahogany would paneling the velvet green wall paper, the couch I was on was appropriate, would floors, hutches and tables, and a nice rug. The couch I was on was comfy too with the appropriate era pillows. I did joke "Why can't I ever dream of being with a hot guy". As I relaxed something felt really sinister in the background, as if it were approaching. The dream was not warping or anything....it felt like something was coming.

AWAKE/????

I am now awake in my bed-tent on my right side, still covered up in my bedding. I cannot move. I am also still being told I am laying peacefully on the couch. I know I am not, but something is trying to convince me otherwise. It is not words...but an enforcing thought of me on the couch and relaxed. I immediately start to growl and call out for help. I am making a lot of noise....something(s) are behind me. I can heard them and feel their thoughts. There are three of them. This is what is overhead...

-"You said he was sleep. Why is he struggling?"

-"Wait. He can here us. We should go. This is not supposed to happen. What is he doing"

-"No. We are not leaving. He will stop. They do this sometimes"

-"This one is different. Something is wrong. We need to leave."

-"He can hear us. He know. We need to leave."

-"No. I am not leaving."

At this point I know I am alone. No one will save me, I am in a secluded part of the house. I should have paid attention to the noise in the kitchen. I am in my tent. They are set on making me believe I am on that couch. They are arguing and having trouble doing what ever they are trying to do. One seems very angry that I am resisting. I change tactics an start to "thrum"...it is a noise crocodiles make. A deep throat rumble. This begin to worry the other two and the "couch" idea is dropped and they depart.

-"No. Comeback. What are you?"

It then leaves as I start to convulse and "Thrum" harder.

When they are all gone I can move. I notice I cannot hear the soundboard. The crickets are off and it is very silent. I sigh. and turn over to my left side to see if the tent was opened. The tent is secure, nothing physically breached it.....however it is really cold like a freezer. As the moonlight is shining through the window I also notice that the light is oddly diffused. There seems to be some type of field in this freezing area. I close one eye at a time, and the barrier/screen is there. I am not going to touch it.

I wait for five minutes, the sound from the soundboard is still not on. The weird diffusion of light is there. It is like looking at a soap bubble and seeing the swirls of color "but there is no color here, just the outlines". I turn back on my right side. Next month they are probably gonna come cause of my birthday. I want to die. I have no one. I am haunted by "them". What is the point.... and I drift off to sleep.


Tuesday, February 11, 2025

Wolfbrother's Markings and Attitude

Date: 1/26/2025 and 2/9/2024
Type: CE2
Location: Los Angeles, CA, 90023
Time of Incidents: N/A
Attempted Time of Sleep: N/A
State of Mind Before: Me (Stressed, Tired), Wolfbrother (Stress, Agitation)
State of Mind After: Me (Stressed, Tired), Wolfbrother (Stress, Agitation)
Odd occurrences before: Wolfbrother Contact Communication
Odd occurrences after: None

As many longtime readers know, my Wolfbrother has certain issues due to his injury and contact with an unknown Alien Intelligence or beings. Like myself he has had encounters with UFOs, Ghost, and Aliens. However, we differ in our understanding of them which can be a real challenge as its come down to belief vs fact. He leans toward more spiritually oriented beliefs, while I lean toward scientific understanding and logic. What complicates things is that our experiences are intertwined.

On my end, the regional group that has been abducting my family had some reorganization issues. A team splintered off and did their own things in North Los Angeles County area. My Wolfbrother's encounters and observation are linked to whatever stuff they have been doing to me. Officially we never meet prior to 2015..... I meet him with them when I was younger and he was just a kid. When we were "reintroduced" both groups were upset, more so his, that we found are way to each other. Both groups have shown their aggression toward us over the years. His being far more aggressive toward me, but somehow never crossing the line since I am a pre-cursor/base to what ever they have done to him.

Beginning December 2024, he has been having communication with them again...which has had messages to indicate that they want him to harm me. That I am responsible for his current state and he would be better off if I wasn't around. He know that is not the case and we do talk about it, but it does eat away at him since they keep repeating the same thing over and over to him. I hear his group as well broadcasting this sometimes, which makes me worry. What is worse is when he confirms what I over hear....which just reinforces this is not a mental illness or our imaginations. Eventually after discussing this we can walk things back to a level understanding. Personally I am worried and stressed as I do not want a repeat of the previous incidents in which he did physically attack me.

January and February of 2025 have produced some worrying items as I found that he has now been marked like myself in the same place.

 


These markings appear on his left shoulder (as mine did), in the same pattern. The first marking showed up January 2025, and that is the "Chevron" with the five dots. These dot are 1/2 inch apart from each other and located toward the arm. About two weeks later a triangle closer to the neck appeared, with the dots evenly space about 1 inch from another, near the neck. He has not had any history of odd marks on his skin there since I known him from 2015 to 2024. He wouldn't let me me photograph it, though he has it one his phone so he saw what I can clearly see. It bothers me cause this is similar to what I have had and reoccurs once in awhile. (Note my aunt has never had these markings).

He is talking to something.....and I wont press him on it.. as he has his issues. Yet I do over hear a lot of things which worry me. I have told him in the past that, you can listen...but don't engage. I really don't know what to do....as I am doing my best to try to maintain our well being. Myself I know I am not in a good place, and hanging by a thread for so many years. Endurance is something, but it should not be a life style. No one will save me, but what is the point of being saved when these is no one around anyway?