CPTSD Triggered by minor Incident

Date: 8/12/2024
Type: CE4
Location: Los Angeles, CA, 90023
Time of Incidents: 8:00pm to 8:30pm
Attempted Time of Sleep: 7:45pm
State of Mind Before: Tired
State of Mind After: Me (CPTSD Trigger), Wolfbrother (Confused), Aunt (N/A)
Odd occurrences before: Wolfbrother Seeing things, Unusually sleepy
Odd occurrences after: Unable to sleep for 48 hours

Over the past two months there has been some odd dreams, but nothing too unusual. Most of the activity compared to the past has been slight. My main focus has been taken care of my aunt and wolfbrother, and per-occupied with them which leaves me most of the time too tired to care. My responsibilities with my wolfbrother have been a point of contention, as he is causing a disruption to my limited sleep and recover scheduled. Every once in a while I do need to step back and rest or refresh with some alone and downtime by escaping. However, I do not like alone time where I retreat to our auxiliary unit as I fear I will be targeted. Most of the time there is no apprehension, but the past weeks I really do not want to be there. Besides the odd apprehension, my interests in my own activities have waned and not that I have a weird feeling of ambivalence overall. It is as if I am worried about something, I am hearing and seeing things...but intentionally ignoring it..yet aware of it. I do not feel well, but I have responsibilities and just continue on.

Today's incident was unexpected and unusual. Our overall day began as appointment with his doctor. We got some food, came home watched a movie, and took a nap. Since it is summer and hot, we have been sleeping during the day and active more at night. So when we finally got home he/we relaxed and watched a movie. I was not interested and was oddly tired. I lay down as he watched the movie. Tossing and turning, just laying there... I was being told to sleep.... but I didn't want.... and it was not reasonable for me to leave....though I should...but I shouldn't cause of the heat.... so I am told I need to SLEEP. When the movie was over I tried to get up and play a game to relax so I could process the request and sleep. However I wasn't allowed to do that as the string urge to sleep kept coming and body was shutting down. I let my wolfbrother know and we took a nap.

Dream 1

I soon found myself dreaming. However, I felt strangely lucid. It was Christmas time and I was over my evil aunt's house. No one was there except for myself and her. I didn't want to be here, especially dealing with her. As I started to walk to the door to leave she attacked me. I quickly defend myself and realized this is really not what I expected. She was growling and drooling. For some reason I saw this as some sort of demonic possession, and immediately started to exorcise her. I battled back and held her against the couch, I started to recite an exorcism ritual and tried to get through to her. I tried to remove the demon from her body. I tried to reach her as a person....

Dream 2

The scene shifted. I was walking in an abandon downtown area of a city with very high buildings. There were two female blonde nurses in white 60's gown stabbed on the street in front of an abandoned school. Young blonde girls in grey smocks were examining the area and doing forensics on how the nurses died. Six of them in total, with tiny brushes sweeping the crime scene. They looked at me, yet continued to do there odd work. There was a young boy with a board running a scam, all you to do was pick the highest black number. If you were correct you win a prize and someone dies. He kept telling me it was my turn and I had play now. I didn't want to, and he said it would be worse if I refused. So I said fine and went over to one of the girls and told here to pick the black circle that was at the bottom. He was upset, as all the high black numbers were hidden within the black circle. Since I didn't technically pick the numbers, we were all free to go.

 Dream 3

Apparently Wolfbrother had been with me before and I was pushing him on our journey. The abandoned downtown area opened up into a more populated and cleaner area. There were lots of activity with people moving about. We passed a pyramid that looked like a car wash. The carpets here were wet, and the manager came out to yell at us about tracking water all of the place in his wheelchair. We got the carpets dirty too and then he realized that I was with Wolfbrother. He became very irritate saying that "Why are you still with him and you shouldn't be here". It was a short very looking man that was off. I was already upset and told him "I am he who is like he who is like he who is like he who is like he....." and he began to panic. I banished him somewhere and told Wolfbrother we need to go. The other employees at the car wash were happy I got rid of the manager and wanted us to go to the theatere next to "fix" things there. I told them not right now and tried to head home. For some reason we went to a high rise, went through the lobby and to the elevators to get to floor 24 where Wolfbrother's apartment was, however it was a large area about 40ft by 60f't with windows all around. There was a grey carpet, no furniture, could not see outside windows. Wolfbrother was left in elevator. Soon the entire floor titled and I feel face down. I soon realized that this was not a dream  and began to panic. I made this odd statement "Remember your training, you know how to deal with these stressors. Rationalize what is going on and complete your task. Complete the mission. You cannot let them win."

Dream 4

I wake up in my room. It is bright. The room seems off as basic furniture is place where it should be, but none of the decorative of accent items are there. There is a little puppy that runs up to me and is scarred. I ask whats wrong and hold it close to my chest. There is a weird signal noise and I look immediate to the bedroom door and try to get up. Some one says "They are here [my name]." and the door opens. The hallway is off and brightly light, I can see the floor color is there but not the tile... the rose color wall is there but the hallways is blocked off halfway by some weird pinkish membrane. From behind me, two beings lift me up on either side and one behind me pushes me forward. We head toward the bathroom. They are wearing dark brown robes. I know who there are and begin singing/chanting to fend them off. As we enter the bathroom its all fractal mirrors, I can see them clearly and myself in the reflections. We are going up in a spiral, about two rotations up before there is interference from the waking world via my Wolfbrother.

Real World...

Apparently I woke up Ryan, was making a lot of noise. He was worried because he saw something in the room, but did not want to wake me up. However when I started chanting/singing/thrumming.... he threw RDE at me to bonk me awake. On my end...I felt it and quickly fell out of the corridor that they were taking me up. They looked back as I feel away from them. I had my left eye open and my right eye closed. I knew I was in my room with my Wolfbrother, but was unable to open my right eye as I was in two places at once. I was also getting feedback with my left eye..... I could still see the fractal corridor and them fading up into the distance. Also there was a bit of the arrival location from them as I started to pick up on one of their perspectives. They arrived on a railed circle platform within a dimly lit room. The rail around the circle was a smooth stainless steel, broken by three entry ways. Two walked out to a nearby console. The other stood in the center and though "Need to re-establish connection". During the ascent there was communication "Your brother. If we lose you. We have that".

Personal Note: For some odd reason this particular event has bothered me greatly. I was unable to go back to sleep. It started to bring up questions about my paternal visitations and earliest abductions. Why are there so little memories with my paternal visits? I have less than 20 memories.... I know the first two official incidents is with him.... in Irwindale and Santa Fe Dam.... there is a third incident possibly during the kidnapping "CA/AZ/NM/TX" were fireworks were following us during the day while driving in the mountains. My interest in doing anything is gone. I do not want to sleep but I have too...I do not feel well. I am unable to turn off. Something is wrong. After I hit the 35hour mark I am really worried, as I know I should feel tired....but I can't turn off to sleep. I am meditating to make sure my body is functional, but again now usual interest. I need to keep my responsibilities in taking care of my aunt and wolfbrother, 48 hour mark comes and still cannot sleep.... at 66 mark finally fall asleep for 4 hours. Over the next couple of days gradually returns to normal. Highly bothered.

  

Grandmother and Some Dreams

Date: 7/5/2024 to 7/20/2024
Type: CE5
Location: Los Angeles, CA, 90023
Time of Incidents: 4:00am to 6:00am
Attempted Time of Sleep: 3:30am to 4:00am
State of Mind Before: Stressed, Depressed
State of Mind After: Tired (Me), Wolfbrother (Upset), Aunt (N/A)
Odd occurrences before: Wolfbrother Contact and Sightings
Odd occurrences after: Audio "Name Called"

The level of activity varies from time to time. My personal activity unless it is really obvious CE4 stuff are series of CE5 dream intrusions. My Wolfbrother who lives with me has CE4/CE5 level on contact and interference. The main difference between myself and my Wolfbrother is that he initially wants to talk to them and make deals, while observe and resist.

With my Wolfbrother, he claims that they come into the room and look at him. They run by the bed or they appear in the doorways looking in. They communicate at times asking him stupid questions and instigating bad feeling between him and I. They have accused me and tried to convince him that I intend to hurt him, and he needs to strike back "again". This group tries to confuse him a lot, telling him false narratives of his past as well as trying to convince him that they are an authority figure and knows what is best for him. He does communicate this to me, and I try to let him know to not listen and compare things of what they show him and say. Most of the time they do make errors by generalizing things and not accurately portraying stuff... attention to detail is missed...as things are off or illogical. From time to time I do feel a presence before he says something or I do note odd flashes in the room that have no source. So something is happening on his end.

As for myself the high level of activity has decreased from what it was, and it is mostly check ins or feedback when they are in the area. To remind people of what "feedback" I am aware of their presence and can tune in on their activity. Either watching the POV of one or more of them as they walk around and do there stuff, or can hear the overall chatter and instructions. I assume they are within the area, as far as distance I have no idea when this kicks in....but it is not intentional on their end. The odd thing though that they do seem to do is "Dream Intrusion".  Meaning that you can be having a normal dream and they show up in it, as in outplace or an oddly specific theme and tone change take over. I know everyone has there own level of dreaming from lucid to placid, some people can read while other are just observers with no control. These two were interactive and highly lucid in the end where they "intruded".

Dream 1

There was a recent power outage around Fourth of July in my area that influenced this dream. As in the dream the power went out and as usual I go to check on my aunt and get candles/lantern for her so she wouldn't be in the dark. This felt more like a memory reply, and I was aware of it just going through the motions. However when I was walking back to my room, my grandmother was on the floor asking for help (my grandmother passed away in 2000). Without hesitation I went to her to help her up, I asked her what was wrong and she spoke in Spanish saying "They were here. They are in the house. They dragged me out of the room and through me on the floor. What is going on?" I told her "Don't worry. I am here now. Let me help you up and get you to your room. Are you hurt, is everything ok." and I looked her over to make sure she wasn't bruised or bleeding since we have a tile floor in the hallway now. Again she said "They are here. They are watching you. Why is he here? He is so mean to you. You need to be careful, I know you are not happy". I explained to her ignoring the alien reference "He is here because he needs me. He needs help. I am never going to be happy or get what I want. I am doing what is right". The dream intrusion ends there. As I am now fully wake on the floor, I am stressed. Why in the heck would I have dream this? Okay... why the alien references. I dislike having ANY dreams with family members (good or bad standing), with my grandma who is in good standing I don't like that I found her in a state of discomfort (one that had never happened, so that was not a memory). Also the urgency of her warning about "them" and the asking about my "wolfbrother" irked me.

Dream 2

A recurring theme in my dreams of this house is that the "large room" has something wrong with it. In my dreams the room that I slept in while I was younger has been remembered in my dreams as "Super Creepy". The electricity won't work to turn on the lights sometimes, there is a heavy prescience in the room, you don't want to go in, the door opens and closes at times, the windows open and closes on it own, and furniture gets tossed around. In the real world....many of my teenage abductions happened there....and there is some odd activity in there as far as the door opening and closing on it own. In the real world, guest have seen weird shadows from time to time. This time in the dream I am again, for some reason, sleeping in the room again, I am apprehensive since I know this is bad. I check the windows to make sure they are locked and closed, and that the curtains cannot be moved so no one can see in. I look around the room to make sure everything is in its place. The computer monitor, TV, lights and lamps, clear space, and closet doors are closed. I do not want to sleep there. I lay on the bed, but I force myself to stay awake. As I sit there, my aunt and grandma scream. I check on my aunt and she seems okay and tells me to check on my grandmother. I go to her room and she is crying in the bed as if waking up from a horrible nightmare. Again she speaks in Spanish to me "Why are they here. What do they want. They mentioned you. Why are you important to them?". I tried to console her and tell her that she is okay. I explain to her that they always come since i was little, that grandpa saw then, my aunt and mom saw them. You just don't want to accept that they are aliens, you keep things angels or demons. They are not ghosts, but physical beings who have harmed me. I also explain again about my wolfbrother and why he is here. He needs me and he is my family. At this point I hear a loud bang and run to my aunt's room and she is okay. The door to my old room slammed shut and the light go out in the hallway. They are here, in the room. I don't want to go in, but I charge the door and make my way into the room. The light is on, but the whole room is overturned and disarrayed. The window is open and the drapes open. I know this is not good. I wake up very upset. Again, why is my grandmother appearing in my dream. Again... why is she asking about the Aliens and why am I explaining...AGAIN.. about my situation with my wolfbrother.